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I had sworn off sharing more examples of real-life resumes and cover letters for a while because when I’ve done it in the past, I’ve found it supremely frustrating that people want to tear them apart and quibble with details.But a reader just sent me a cover letter that I can’t resist posting, especially because it comes with a “before” version and the “after” version she created after reading the cover letter advice here. I present it here with these caveats, borne of experience with previous samples: Here’s the before version. Like those other 95%, it basically says, “I know I need a cover letter, so here are some paragraphs of blah.” You can imagine multiple candidates for this position submitting this letter; there’s nothing especially personalized about it.
In fact, you should be ecstatic, because while most job candidates completely miss the mark with their applications, you can be one of the few who absolutely knock it out of the park.
While your resume is intended to lay out the cold hard facts, your cover letter is meant to convey more personality and flare.
Through innovative strategizing, implements change management/ recovery campaigns that create organizational stability and prosperity.
Leads hundreds of simultaneous high-stakes projects by creating clear strategies for their successful conclusion.
Lead organization in sales and revenue growth through building strategic alliances that create viable projects with new and existing clients. Manage a 40-person team of sales managers, delivery managers, project managers and software consultants, including line/ executive management as well as recruiting, performance reviews, and compensation evaluation.
Direct 80-100 multimillion and small enterprise content management (ECM) projects (sales consulting) delivered on time and within budget, across 19 U. Additionally aligns extended team of 150 subcontractors with internal project and program goals to extend full-time staff capabilities.I’ll give you step-by-step help through every stage of your job search, explaining at each step what a hiring manager is thinking and what they want to see from you. ROBERT FAIRCHILD12345 Old Oak Lane • Baltimore, MD 12345H: 877.875.7706 • M: 877.875.7706 • [email protected] DIRECTOR OF PROFESSIONAL SERVICESScope Management, Strategic Planning, International Business Development Award-winning executive tactical planner creates and distributes profitable solutions in new and growth-oriented companies and in a variety of industries.Prior experience includes hands-on technical design, implementation, and management of high profile web projects using Microsoft and Java technologies in the utilities industry.Developed first Pan-Electricity industry online data management system.Spearheaded large technical integration projects for Fortune 500 companies requiring web or intranet presence utilizing thousands of web content pages, which now almost universally maintain essential longevity and utility.Primary business consultant on Fortune 500 projects in a variety of industries, including entertainment, aerospace, web portals, magazines/ online publishing, banking, automotive, and shipping.I’ve been following the new castle movement since the earliest days of the original “Save the Tombs” campaign, and I am so excited to see this vision becoming a reality.I’ve already checked out the new castle website, and the renderings of the new throne and great hall are stunning, to say the least – I particularly love the vintage murals and art featured throughout the building. In closing, I am thrilled at the possibility of being involved in the new castle almost literally from the ground up, and would love the opportunity to meet with you and discuss the value that I can bring to the Targaryen organization and the Westeros Castle Project.I’m not only used to wearing many hats, I sincerely enjoy it; I thrive in an environment where no two work days are exactly the same.In addition to being flexible and responsive, I’m also a fanatic for details – particularly when it comes to presentation.